Ten Signs That You Are Dating A Narcissist

Maybe there are some signs in your relationship that make you feel uncomfortable. However, you have not been able to put a finger on what exactly is bothering you. If your partner talks too much about themselves and their problems and projects are idealized images of themselves, then maybe it’s because  you are dating a narcissist.

In this article we will share some of the warning signs and what to do about it.

Narcissistic personality disorder

According to psychologist Stephen Johnson, a narcissist is a person who has “buried his true self-expression in response to early injuries and replaced it with a highly developed, compensating false self.”

The traditional image of a narcissist who is in love with himself is not the image that corresponds to the real narcissist. In stark contrast, the narcissist is not in love with himself. They are actually deeply hurt, have low self-esteem and hide under their idealized self instead of facing reality.

Dealing with a narcissist is not easy. Their need to feel superior can actually cause them to demean and undermine others.

Below we will share some of the typical behaviors of narcissists and what you can do about it… especially if you are dating a narcissist.

Signs that you are dating a narcissist

1. Their conversations feel like endless monologues

A conversation with a narcissist can be boring and a frustrating experience. This is because in reality  a narcissist does not have a “conversation”, but they maintain an endless and boring monologue. They never have dialogues since there is no exchange of ideas and opinions.

Even if you try to say something, they will not let you participate. They will simply interrupt you with words such as “but”, “why” or “because”. This is because a narcissist often believes that they know everything. If you manage to express your opinions, then they will ignore you or correct you.

For that reason, it is normal for you to feel frustrated after trying to have a conversation with a narcissist.

2. All conversations are about them

The topic of conversation always ends up being about them. Even in conversations with several people, a narcissist will actually always try to turn the conversation back to them or an object – or person – that they honor or want. For that reason,  narcissists are people who constantly interrupt and take over the whole thing without respecting others.

Not only do they not listen to others, but they simply ignore them and monopolize all assemblies. For that reason, if you are dating a narcissist, then it makes sense for you to feel degraded and underestimated.

3. They like to break the rules

A narcissist needs to feel different and superior. For that reason,  it is common for narcissists to enjoy breaking the rules. For example, this may involve not respecting the rules of the road, taking things from work at home, and so on.

These actions make them feel that they are above the law, the rules, and society. They feel superior and think they can get away with anything.

4. You date a narcissist if your partner does not respect boundaries

Since they feel superior, you will always be below them. Narcissists therefore do not respect or meet the needs of their partner. They are their only priority.

Have you ever lent them money that they have not repaid? Do they undermine your feelings or successes? Do they discourage you from having a healthy time alone and space for yourself?

If so, that’s a sign that you’re dating a narcissist.

 5. If you are dating a narcissist, then they are showing a false image of themselves

This is the basic trait of a narcissist. For example, they may feel that they need to spend too much time caring for themselves because they need to impress others. They usually also give themselves compliments in front of others and say things like “Look how well this suits me” or “I really am something special”.

They think they need to make others believe they are worth their admiration. In reality, however, they are deeply insecure individuals with low self-esteem.

6. They think they should be the center of the world

Not only are your needs less important, but a  narcissist also expects you to meet their needs before your own. A narcissist believes that they are the most important in a relationship, which is why they will require you to give them attention all the time, regardless of your own needs and obligations.

7. They were charming to start with

They were charming as they tried to win your heart. You thought they were  charismatic, persuasive, charming and thoughtful. As the relationship developed and the interest in winning your heart disappeared, something felt wrong though.

The narcissist must be the best at everything. They must therefore also be perfect. When they start to get bored, things change.

8. If you date a narcissist, they make it seem like they are a hero or heroine

As they feel superior, they build an idealized image of themselves. They often portray themselves as heroes or heroines who are extremely outstanding and superior to others.

For that reason, they can sincerely believe that you are not worth anything without them.

9. Some narcissists make themselves victims

A good way for people with a narcissistic personality to get attention is by making themselves victims. Thus, they will make you forget your own needs and  focus on them. This is their goal right from the start.

However, this can also happen at any other time. A narcissist can make you feel guilty about how you treat them  if you do not treat them the way they want.

10. They are manipulative

For narcissists, other people are nothing but a means  to meet their needs. For example, they may choose a partner who is physically beautiful or wealthy, just to show them off in front of others or to ensure that their needs are met.

This is what you should do if you are dating a narcissist

If you want things to change, then you need to be more assertive. That’s why you should:

• Recognize that they need help. If you want to stay in the relationship, then you need to understand, deep down, that narcissists are insecure people with low self-esteem.
• Encourage them to seek therapy. A narcissistic personality disorder is a condition that can seriously damage a person’s quality of life, not to mention the people around them. Good psychological therapy is the best way to help them heal their wounds that led to the disorder to begin with, and then treat it or avoid it causing problems in the future.

• Go to therapy. In addition to encouraging them to go to therapy, you will also need to seek help yourself if this is a relationship you are dedicated to. In therapy, you can learn how to better take care of yourself in your relationship.

In addition, you must:

• Show them that their behavior is bothering you. You need to make them understand the things that bother you, such as not being able to have a conversation with them, the fact that they always prioritize their own needs over yours, etc. Tell them, that you are also important and have your own needs and requirements.
• Stay positive. Even when you explain to them that you are important too, make sure you do not let them know that their behavior is really hitting you. If you let them know that you are really angry, then you may be able to confirm their superiority without wanting to. Instead, explain these things calmly and set appropriate boundaries.

• Stay focused. Even if narcissists try to make you see that their goals are more important, remember that you also have your own. Do not let yourself be carried away and do not forget that you always have your own personality, needs, goals and dreams.

Do you recognize any of these signs? If you do, then act now! Whether you either break up because you are not feeling well in the relationship or you decide to stay in it,  do not forget that you are just as important as your partner.