Breaking In The Family Takes A Lot Of Time And Energy To Heal

Family fractures are traumatic, empty and deep wounds that cannot always be repaired. Breakups in the family are no joke.

The influence caused by an absent parent, a toxic mother, aggressive language, shouting or lack of security and affection causes something more than just the classic lack of self-esteem or deep-seated fear.

Often, the difficulty in resolving many intimate and private consequences lies in the fact that wounds in the mind are caused early.

We must not forget that prolonged stress – and stress at an early age – causes the architecture of the brain to change. Thus, structures related to emotions can change.

All this can lead to greater vulnerability and a deeper helplessness. This carries a greater risk of certain emotional disorders.

The family is our first contact with the social world. If that experience does not feed our essential needs, it can affect the rest of our lives.

Let’s look at why it is so difficult to overcome injuries that occur in the early part of our lives.

Our culture tells us that the family provides unconditional support. That’s why family breakups are so painful

The last scenario where we think we are hurt, betrayed, disappointed or even abandoned is without a doubt in the heart of our family.

• However, it happens more often than you think.
  The role models that are supposed to give us confidence, encouragement, positivity, love and security can voluntarily or involuntarily fail us.
• For a child, a teenager or even an adult, experiencing betrayal or disappointment in the family can help develop a trauma that we will never be able to prepare ourselves for.

• Betrayal in the heart of a family is more painful than a single betrayal by a friend or colleague. It is an attack on our identity and our roots.

Breakups in the family are passed on through generations

A family is something more than a genealogical tree, a genetic code, or a few common surnames.

Families share stories and emotional legacies. Often, traumatic past is inherited from generation to generation in many different ways.

For example, the study of epigenetics tells us that everything that happens in our immediate environment can have an impact on our genes. Factors such as fear, severe stress or trauma can be transmitted many times from parents to children.

This means that we are sometimes more or less likely to suffer from depression or react with better or worse tools when faced with adverse situations.

Although we may be distancing ourselves from our family circle, there are still wounds

At some point, we can all do it. We say enough is enough and we dare to cut the malicious link off. We do this to establish the necessary distance from our traumatic and dysfunctional family.

But the simple fact that we decide to say goodbye also hurts us. It does not heal the wounds by itself. It’s a start, but it’s not the complete solution.

It is not easy to leave a story, the dynamics, the memories or the empty space in between.

Many of these things are related to our personality and the way we relate to others.

People with a traumatic past tend to be more suspicious. Thus, it is very difficult for them to establish solid relationships.

Anyone who has been injured needs to be reaffirmed. They want others to fill these gaps. Therefore, they often feel frustrated because few people are able to offer them everything they need.

The best advice in these cases is to try to heal yourself first as a person before searching for what you need in others.

We may come to question ourselves when there is a breakup in the family

This is perhaps the most complex and saddest thing.

Someone who has spent much of their early life in a dysfunctional home or in a family with negative parents may believe that they do not deserve to be loved.

The education we receive and our relationship with their mother or father is the very root of our personality and our self-esteem.

The negative impact of these remnants is very intense. Therefore, much of the time we may have doubts about our own efficiency, self-esteem or even whether we are worthy of our dreams.

Our family can either give us wings or pull them away from us. It’s sad and devastating.

However, there is something we must never forget. No one can choose their parents or their relatives, but there always comes a time when we are able and obligated to choose how our lives should be.

Choose to be strong, be happy, free and emotionally mature. To do this, you must overcome and heal your past.

Are you ready to heal a breakup in the family?